New Month & Jan Reflection

Hello my lovelies welcome to a new month!

It’s been an interesting few days. After my first week off it was hard to get back in to the routine of work again mentally and physically. However we were five days in and I now have another week off to recharge again! This doesn’t happen often I just have the last of my holidays to use before they reset..if only I could work five days and have weeks off in between every time eyy..

So I’m back to planning and gearing myself up for when work does become intense again. I feel prepared to work on myself even more this week to make it easier for my future. We’re in a new month that looks perfect on the calendar this year (if you know, you know) which is so satisfying it almost brings me a little peace. Last month my goal was to recognise who I was again which, I believe I found. Taking the time to recognise what I needed to focus on was so important and I now feel I can work on the right things to balance out what makes me feel a certain way. I also updated you on my goals for the year so far which of course are on going. I went for my first solo walk/run yesterday since December. It was so refreshing (once my heart rate calmed down in between each sprint). It was the perfect start to my month and my week off and I felt already I was working towards my fitness goal.

Today it’s been snowing which doesn’t bother me as I can stay inside and it’s pretty to look at but also means I haven’t been out for a run and I also slept in a lot longer than I have done for months as it was cosy this morning. Not a bad thing to have a day doing nothing but also my productive side of me is pushing me to try get something done. Hence why this catch up post has become a thing.

I opened my year planner this morning which takes me through writing my goals for the new month but also reflecting upon the previous.

My achievements for January:

In January I achieved a few things, firstly recognising myself again and my needs as I spoke about above.

• I saved money on my car insurance which was a positive to me as it allows me to put that money in to saving for something in the future!

• I survived another month through this god awful pandemic. This time not being able to see my friends on a walk as restrictions apply. This has been even harder but it has to be done and I still kept in touch via the phone where I could.

• I feel I was a lot more honest with myself last month. This allowed me to be realistic with how I was feeling and with what I needed. I requested help where needed and I felt I got through it so much easier so hopefully I can keep this mentality up.

• But my main achievement for January was publishing this blog and carrying on the enjoyment of writing it! I’ve said before regardless of how many read it, it’s really kept me going and allowed me to escape/ be productive and I’m so proud of myself for having the idea in the first place.

Some things that distracted me mentally or I feared:

• Of course I'm still on a journey so one of my fears is always waking up having a down day and not getting myself out of it. I allowed a few people to take control of my emotions in such a negative way and this needs to stop. They make me feel worthless and I need to block that from happening no matter what the situation.

• I had a big fear of feeling unloved and unwanted. No not in the friend way… again it’s hard with the climate we are in but it doesn’t make it any easier when everyone is in similar mind sets and I can’t see anyone. I know I don’t need anyone to make me happy but it is nice to have a little attention and for someone to make you feel like you are beautiful. Maybe we will find it this month, maybe not we will see!

• Finally work fears me a lot as I become more stressed I feel like career wise I am struggling and maybe not where I need to be. But I have good support in this field. My boss reminds me each time we have a catch up that I can do it and I have been doing it for all this time. My mental health doesn’t have to defeat me if I don’t let it and I just have to keep remembering that.

First month not perfect but I saw it as progress and found many things to work on which is what we want! I have my fitness goals to keep up to this month. It’s going to be harder to motivate myself when I'm working normally again but I need to use my time wisely instead of sitting dreading going to work wasting the time away I do have.

• I also need to sort out my diet, again work somehow stops me eating. I either get too stressed and don’t want to eat or I’m too invested and just forget to eat. This is bad and my body needs substance to change, so let's focus on this too.

• Relationships wise I have reconnected with some people which is good and means I have even more people around me. But I also need to reduce the amount of time I give to certain people so they can’t come in and ruin my mentality or remind me of negative times we want to stay away from. I don’t think this will be easy at all, it never is but I am ready for the challenge and I hope I can progress even further this month.

• I’m loving myself a little more lately and I want to keep this going. If you love something about yourself each day then you’ll slowly appreciate yourself more and more.

Plenty of goals, plenty of fears but I’m ready for them all. Have you planned your month? You don’t have to be as organised as me but think about things you can improve or things you loved lately that you want to keep going. Stay in control! Not obsessively but enough to enjoy life and stay calm no matter what situation you face this month. Be kind to yourself and others will follow.

More posts en route as I’ll be prepping a lot more this week. Thank you to everyone who contributed to my January in the best way, I love you all. But also thank you to those who tried to ruin it as it allows me to become stronger. It also allows me to send a big wave of F*ck You to the right people and leave them behind if they don’t deserve my time.

Hope you are having a good week so far and continue you to have an even better tomorrow!

Speak soon Jade x